Isn’t it funny how you can watch tv, the news, read a newspaper, flip through a magazine, watch a movie… and hear or watch it and that’s all you do. But, then one day…

All those articles, news briefs, current movies…. Start to hit home.

It’s not that you didn’t feel, in your thoughts or emotions, about those stories or what had happened… they just weren’t personal. It had to do with “other” people. People you didn’t know, but now…. It’s personal, it’s your person that’s being affected, and all those ads, advertisements, movie scenes, coincide with your personal life. It’s as if these messages were following you around waiting to strike at your most vulnerable time.

I remember Steve asking me, just after he was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer, am I going to leave him? Because he saw on the news how many marriages break up after a cancer diagnosis. It never crossed my mind, but yet, there was a news story about it that coincided with our lives.

And then, after Steve passed away in 2021, there was the Netflix show “After Life”. How appropriate for me to watch in my most vulnerable time.

And tonight I watched “A Man Called Otto”. Again, so honest about how I have felt at times since Steve passed away, to a degree of actions that I wouldn’t/won’t act upon, but, I could understand how Otto might feel this way.

Within a month after Steve passing, I went on a scheduled trip to our favorite winery in North Carolina. It was an “incentive“ for Steve to keep hanging on and fight, but sadly he didn’t make it. While I was there, I saw was a news story about giving hope to men who are diagnosed with prostate cancer. I can’t even tell you what it was, it was so soon after Steve had passed away, it probably wouldn’t have helped in his situation, but I remember thinking, “If only…”

And I know, it’s not funny… it was just in the cards… Steve’s fate, my future… the future of others.

I’m sure, every time a new discovery is made, I’ll be happy but I’ll be sad,

….It really won’t be “funny,” but a great new discovery!